I learned another life lesson today…
The mother that listens to her children’s crazy ideas is a fool. If you don’t know already, this is the fool talking. Remember how much fun it was to ride your bike when you were a kid? You could ride for hours on end anywhere and everywhere. Guess what? When you are over 35 but not yet 40 it’s not quite the same. Add in a 5-year-old wobbling on a ‘trail a bike’ and it’s like a new twisted form of punishment.

Tonight all my boys convinced me it would be better if we rode bikes downtown rather than take a nice quiet walk. I agreed (caved) and since my hubby was out of town and I do not have a bike of my own I thought in a moment of Female Testosterone (you know when a woman believes she can do the same physical activity or task as a man without any problems, knowing full well it’s just not physically possible) that I would just use his bike. After all the ‘trail a bike’ was already hooked up so why not. Keep in mind I am more than too short to really touch the ground without practically dislocating my toes if I ride my husbands’ bike, and I know this full well.

So we make it out of the driveway and already realize that at any second I could tip over and not only hurt myself but terrify and break my youngest son. This was only after 50 feet, downhill no less! I have less than zero control on this thing, and I am sure the neighbors thought I had at least a few beers before getting on that awful bike because I could not keep a straight line let alone keep it from swaying side to side! Hey, kids are we having fun yet?! Did I mention that it’s basically uphill both ways? Serious, Petoskey is odd that way. I am sure for some its a wonderful workout but for me, it just felt like a sick game.

After teetering and tottering all six or so blocks to town and narrowly missing a tree, and a parked car I realized getting home was going to be worse as the hills are twice as steep, my legs were burning, and my passenger seemed to be getting more tippy as we went along. So I did what any good mother would do. I insisted we park the bikes, bought them all ice cream, and took them to the park. I figured by delaying the ride home it might turn out to be like childbirth and I would forget the pain and anguish right away so I could tackle it again. No such luck.

As I am sure you can tell, we made it home and all in one piece. And those who are wondering… No, I did not. I am too stubborn to allow myself to have taken my oldest sons bike and ride home alone really fast and get the van and go back and load everyone in…see Female Testosterone.